Parenting a child with a disability presents unique challenges, including maneuvering the special education maze. Productive IEP meetings rely not only on all IEP Team members having an understanding of the special education process, but also on having a commitment to working together. Maintaining positive communication and using collaboration strategies are key to working as partners in children’s education. 1. Be sure that all parties have the same information so that everyone can feel like an equal member of the team. Making sure that all IEP team members have the results of an independent educational evaluation from a parent, or the parent has the results of an evaluation conducted by the school in advance of a meeting ensures that all members can participate more effectively in meetings.2. Be proactive, not reactive. While it is easy to ignore a small problem and hope that it will go away, this is rarely a good plan. 3. Establish a climate where everyone feels safe, welcome and comfortable. You can do this by establishing some basic ground rules at the beginning of a meeting, making sure that everyone has been introduced to each other, and hold the meeting at a time and in a place where everyone can participate. 4. Use effective communication techniques, such as focusing on interests instead of positions. Positions are a statement of what you want. By focusing on the interests, each person is more aware of the other’s point of view and the reasons behind it. They are then better able to brainstorm an appropriate resolution to the issue, one that is respectful of the concerns and needs that have been expressed by all parties. 5. Be clear so there is less room for misunderstandings to occur. At the end of a meeting, summarize what activities have been agreed upon, when will these activities begin, who will implement the plan, when the team will meet to discuss the outcome and plan any needed next steps. It is also helpful for participants (parents and note taker for the school district) to exchange copies of their notes. 6. Try not to say things that close the door on further discussion. Instead of saying, “we can’t do that”, you might say, “tell me more”, “explain why that is so important to you” or “what would we have to do to make that happen?” These questions demonstrate to the other person that you respect them and want to try to understand their point of view and why it is important to them. 7. Act as partners. If you treat others as equal partners and expect, in turn, to be treated the same way, a more positive tone will be set. One way to be partners is to work together to identify issues and strategize solutions. 8. Recognize that disagreements will occur. This is a natural occurrence when people are discussing something about which they feel passionately. It is important that, when disagreements arise, that everyone commit to resolving them using the least adversarial approach. 9. Establish a school climate where parental involvement is recognized as a critical component to children’s success in school. 10. Attend one of the free workshops offered by the Parent Information Center on Special Education so that you can become a more informed and effective member of the child’s IEP team. For more information on special education, visit the Parent Information on Special Education website at www.nhspecialed.org .Click to download A Family Guide to Special Education in NHNow Available in Spanish!
Parenting a child with a disability presents unique challenges, including maneuvering the special
education maze. Productive IEP meetings rely not only on all IEP Team members having an
understanding of the special education process, but also on having a commitment to working
together. Maintaining positive communication and using collaboration strategies are key to working as
partners in children’s education.
1. Be sure that all parties have the same information so that everyone
can feel like an equal member of the team. Making sure that all IEP
team members have the results of an independent educational
evaluation from a parent, or the parent has the results of an evaluation
conducted by the school in advance of a meeting ensures that all
members can participate more effectively in meetings.
2. Be proactive, not reactive. While it is easy to ignore a small
problem and hope that it will go away, this is rarely a good plan.
3. Establish a climate where everyone feels safe, welcome and
comfortable. You can do this by establishing some basic ground
rules at the beginning of a meeting, making sure that everyone has
been introduced to each other, and hold the meeting at a time and in a
place where everyone can participate.
4. Use effective communication techniques, such as focusing on
interests instead of positions. Positions are a statement of what you
want. By focusing on the interests, each person is more aware of the
other’s point of view and the reasons behind it. They are then better
able to brainstorm an appropriate resolution to the issue, one that is
respectful of the concerns and needs that have been expressed by all
parties.
5. Be clear so there is less room for misunderstandings to occur. At the end of a meeting,
summarize what activities have been agreed upon, when will these activities begin, who will
implement the plan, when the team will meet to discuss the outcome and plan any needed
next steps. It is also helpful for participants (parents and note taker for the school district) to
exchange copies of their notes.
6. Try not to say things that close the door on further discussion. Instead of saying, “we can’t do that”, you might say, “tell
me more”, “explain why that is so important to you” or “what would we have to do to make that happen?” These questions
demonstrate to the other person that you respect them and want to try to understand their point of view and why it is
important to them.
7. Act as partners. If you treat others as equal partners and expect, in turn, to be treated the same way, a more positive
tone will be set. One way to be partners is to work together to identify issues and strategize solutions.
8. Recognize that disagreements will occur. This is a natural occurrence when people are discussing something about
which they feel passionately. It is important that, when disagreements arise, that everyone commit to resolving them using
the least adversarial approach.
9. Establish a school climate where parental involvement is recognized as a critical component to children’s success in
school.
10. Attend one of the free workshops offered by the Parent Information Center on Special Education so that you can become
a more informed and effective member of the child’s IEP team.
For more information on special education, visit the Parent Information on Special Education website at www.nhspecialed.org .
Click to download
A Family Guide to
Special Education in NH
Now Available in Spanish!
The NH Parents Make the Difference website is a collaboration between the Parent Information Center of NH and the
NH Department of Education. This website is supported with funding from the US Department of Education through
the NH State PIRC grant of the Natonal PIRC program.
© 2010 The Parent Information Center of NH
